A few weeks ago, the professionals at Susurrus decided to question Ralan Conley from Ralan.com, AKA Ralan Conley's Webstravaganza. He seemed to manifest abnormal behaviors that warrented investigation. We decided to pose said investigation as an interview, to keep him calm. Observe how subtly the professionals at Susurrus evaluate the subject in what appears to be a regular interview (especially to the untrained eye).

The Ralan Conley Interview-stravaganza

A detailed personality analysis performed by the psychologists as Susurrus Press indicates that if Ralan Conley had a dog, it would probably look like this.

 

Susurrus: Thanks for coming. Please sit down. I'd like to ask you a few questions, if that's okay. [Ralan nods noncommitally] First, what motivated you to start a collection of market listings?

Ralan: As I re-started submitting short stories in 1993 (I had tried my hand at this in my teens and early twenties), I found a real lack of market listings, publishing news, and resources. I subscribed to Writer’s Digest (cost a fortune for foreign delivery!) and bought their yearly Writer’s Market, but found out the hard way that: 1) their listings for speculative markets were limited, and 2) many were badly out of date.
Since I live in the frozen wastes of Scandinavia, copies of English language speculative magazines were extremely hard to come by, so I wrote to every magazine I could find, asking for guidelines. As my collection grew I began putting it into an electronic form I could rifle through more easily, separating them into non-paying, paying, semipro, and pro markets. I also got online around that time because I taught (among other things) computer skills at a school for “problem” young people. In my off time, I searched out new markets and writing resources that slowly began to come online. I taught myself (and my students at the same time) how to program HTML and together we built a web site for the school, one of the first educational sites in Scandinavia.

In November of 1996, I felt I had enough material for a Speculative Fiction Market Listing web site. My reason for going online was to help other writers like me; those stuck in far away places with little or no
information about writing, manuscript formatting, or how to find markets. I’ve always visualized my target user as someone in the Congo, or somewhere like that, who has to walk long distances to reach a larger
village to get maybe ten minutes on a solar-powered computer. At that time, I called my web site Ralan’s Home on the Web. Soon other writers were contacting me with tips on markets and resources and the thing just grew. In 1998, I started mailing out a monthly newsletter to all the editors or publishers of the publications I listed and to writers who joined my mailing list. That list now goes out to over 1500 people every month as Ralan’s Monthly Report.

Susurrus: Do you ever feel guilty after eating?

Ralan: Only if I knew the main course well.

Susurrus: Congratulations on your site's tenth anniversary. How has the site changed or evolved in the past ten years? Has it met or exceeded your expectations? Has it grown or evolved in unexpected ways?

Ralan: Thanks. In the beginning I did my own web designing, but later my oldest son became a programmer and he took over the basic design for the web site. He now owns his own company, Wildside, and is in the process of designing a new look for Ralan.com with a searchable database. But I
won’t go away from the listings as they are now. While some writers like the speed of a database search, many others prefer to browse through the listings. I think my web site should allow both. I might mention that while the overall design of the top and side panel is my son’s the actual info and design on the various pages is mine, and all those colors I use to make things stand out are my choices, not his. I sometimes get
chastised for not being very design-friendly for this. Sorry about that, but I feel that highlighting the different kinds of information with different colors is more important than aesthetic considerations.

My policy about markets has changed over the years. At the outset, I listed every market I could find. Now, except for the Semi & Pro Markets page and pro anthologies on the Anthology Markets page, I only list markets that want a listing. I’ve found that some smaller markets don’t have the capacity to handle the amount of submissions they get after debuting at Ralan.com. I also reserve the right, based on my own criteria, to list, or not to list any market that applies for a listing, or is already listed but changes its guidelines, or the manner in which they treat writers. If anyone finds a market that isn’t listed, they should
write me and I’ll let them know if it’s because I haven’t heard of it before, or if there is another reason for the omission.

The site has absolutely exceeded my expectations. The number of awards it has won is overwhelming, and the number of visitors is beyond anything I ever expected. It's mostly been through word of mouth (or word of e-mail and messages boards), because I have never indulged in link exchanges or other forms of advertising. Anyone who links to me does so of their own volition, it is never a requirement for a link or listing at Ralan.com. I also only link to web sites that I feel have sufficient writing related content. Many authors, for example, write me asking for a link in the "Authors" category on my "Writing Links" page. Most of them only have promos for their own writing. Now, there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. We all need to promote ourselves, but I can't link to them (I'd have thousands if I did!) unless they have real and unique content that helps writers, publishers, or editors. Except for the "Hired Help" category (which I try to be sure of), they are all free.


Susurrus: You're also an accomplished writer, and you've been published in a handful of anthologies and magazines. Who are your biggest influences? What are your top five books?

Ralan: My influences are many, and I get new ones all the time as I discover writers I haven't read before. One of the biggest is Robert Heinlein. I've read everything by him, most of them several times, and he's the
only author I can say that about. Among my favorite books, or series of same, are: Heinlein's The Moon is a Harsh Mistress, Steven Donaldson's The Chronicles of Thomas Covenant the Unbeliever, Isaac Asimov's The Foundation Trilogy (and beyond), Piers Anthony's Xanth books, Ken Grimwood's Replay, Harry Harrison's Stainless Steel Rat series, Larry Niven's Ringworld books, and Chistopher Stasheff's Warlock series. That's more than five, I know, but it's hard to whittle down.

Susurrus: Do you have trouble carrying out tasks without being sidetracked? Do you get restless when your movement is restricted?

Ralan: I don't like being sidetracked. I start out in the morning and like to get all the web site things finished by lunch. In fact, I only eat lunch when I am finished with that part of my day. I relax over lunch.
Afterwards I do some writing and editing, then check the e-mail for anything that’s come in. Because I live in the Romance Time Zone not much comes in during my working hours however, unless it's from Britain, and sometimes Australia.

I hate feeling trapped. I'm a very independent person.

Susurrus: What made you decide that the Internet was the most viable medium for your collection? Do you think people tend to discredit you because you’re an Internet publication, or do people tend to be receptive to the possibility of a quality electronic resource?

Ralan: As I said above, the Internet was coming on very strong at the time I started, and I saw it as a great leveler, especially in regard to writers who live in the sticks, world-wise. For what I do, I’m sure the
Internet is the only way to be up-to-date. I almost always post updates within a day of getting them -- minutes in many cases. No paper-based market list can come close to that. Even Writer's Digest now has on-line listings. I've never used them, so I can't say how often they update. But back when I was using their monthly magazine (with its few market updates) and their yearly Market Guide, I frequently wasted money on markets that had folded years before. A yearly updated market list is worthless in my view; even monthly is not enough for this fast moving market. So, I can't see that anyone can discredit Ralan.com because of the medium.


Susurrus: Are you concerned about physically harming a loved one, pushing a stranger in front of a bus, steering your car into oncoming traffic; inappropriate sexual contact; or poisoning dinner guests?

Ralan: Isn't everyone? Actually, I've tried most of these things and they're overrated.

Honestly, I'm neither homicidal nor suicidal. I'd like us all to live forever.

Susurrus: For the past few years, you've had writing contests. You also have all of the response times for every submission you've sent out since 1993 listed, a monthly "report" full of advice and updates, and a huge links page of resources for writers. How does all this dedication to helping other writers pay off?

Ralan: Personal satisfaction is a big pay back. I went to the WorldCon in Glasgow last year, and it was simply a complete high to have so many people come up, shake my hand, and say thanks for what I do. I also think it has helped somewhat in my writing. Editors buy the story, not the name (unless you have a really huge one!), but I think if they know your name, you'll at least get a fair reading. Most editors know my name, even the biggest ones. The awards are nice too. Being a three-time Stoker Award finalist certainly doesn't hurt.

Monetarily, the one banner ad on the web site, the text ad in the Monthly Report, and one-third of the entry fees for the contest manage to pay the bills for maintaining the web site. Before I had those, I footed
the bill out of my own pocket ... of course, things were cheaper back then.

Susurrus: Where did Fil (your monster companion) come from? What is he? What does he eat? Is trained to use the litterbox? Does he have legs?

Ralan: Fil comes from Hellina Basket, a suburb of Hades. He's a very minor demon, who is usually mistaken for some kind of man-sized reptile. He eats hand outs, which is why I advise visitors to keep their hands and feet inside the listings at all times. We have two cats, Daisy and Jazz, who guard their liter boxes zealously, so frankly I don't know where he goes to eliminate waste, or even if he does. He has legs just the same as any other virtual monster from Hell. He's useful in many ways, but doesn't actually do any work on the web site. Other than the basic design, I do it all on my own. He just crouches on my desk and glares at me, occasionally shaking his head.

Susurrus: When you've just finished a story, do you use your own web site to decide where to submit it? There are a lot of sites that try to collect market listings, and many of them are years out of date or too small to really be useful. What did you do differently to avoid becoming another one of them?

Ralan: Absolutely. It's the best place, even for me. I never use any other market list. Never even check them out to see what they're doing, unless someone reports that one seems to be using my listings verbatim. I don't ever want to be accused of borrowing information from anyone else.

All my updates and tips come from the publishers and editors of the markets I list and from writers who pass things they experience out there along to me. It wouldn't work without that and it's what makes
Ralan.com what it is.

Susurrus: What is the most important thing for the amateur writer to know?

Ralan: It’s important to read and follow, to the letter, each publication's guidelines. Make yourself familiar with the type of material each publication buys. Be sure your writing is at an acceptable, professional
level: no spelling or grammar mistakes; good word choice, sentence and paragraph structure; make sure you have a story, not a vignette. Join a writing workshop to make certain your writing is up to par before your begin to submit. Writers are always the worse judges of their own work; either being too critical, or too self-assured of their brilliance. The truth usually lies somewhere in the middle. Work at your writing.
Practice. Write every day. Study articles and books on the various aspects of good writing: characterization, plot, description, setting, style, point of view, tenses, beginnings, middles and ends. And lastly ... read, read, read! Read everything you can, from the classics to your own preferred genre.

Susurrus: Thanks for your time. Any parting words of wisdom?

Ralan: Keep you arms and feet inside the listings at all times. And remember that editors are people too, with all the faults, feelings, and pimples we others have.

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Diagnosis:

Through our psychological exam posing as an interview, we've managed to come up with a very accurate map of Ralan's psyche. It seems as though his website project is just the tip of the iceberg for his compulsive obsessions.       The professionals at Susurrus believe he probably collects small figurines and keeps a meticulously clean house. He enjoys contemplating battles between his two pet cats and the "demon" he claims to speak with. He has also hinted that he wishes to live forever. Due to the mix of symptoms, we reccomend a live-in psychiatric counselor. Based on initial diagnosis, he seems to be suffering from a dissociative anxiety complicated by a tendency to "carry stress in the jaw", caused by an obsessive gene and inflamed or triggered by contact with demons, harmless or otherwise.       His treasure trove of a website, Ralan Conley's Webstravaganza, is at www.ralan.com